"If that dog does not stop chasing my cats, she has got to go," my husband insisted. "I am NOT going to have them constantly in hiding because they are too terrified to move."
"I know," I admitted miserably. "I feel terrible too. I've even been doing some research to find out what obedience trainers have to say about it."
"And?"
"And they say that you have to establish yourself as the Alpha Dog in the household."
Rich looked at me blankly. "How exactly are you going to do that?"
"Next time I catch her going after one of the cats, I'm going to roll her over and grab her neck in my teeth."
"You're going to bite the dog?" my husband asked, genuinely startled.
"Of course not," I said indignantly. "I'm just going to assume the alpha position."
Rich raised a brow and his lips twitched.
"Ahem!" I looked at him sternly. "I meant I'm going to take on the dominant role."
"Really?" he grinned evilly.
"Don't even go there, buddy. Anyway, maybe it will work. I just have to catch her in the act."
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Five minutes later I got my chance. Rich and I were in our room when we heard a scuffle outside the door followed by hissing, yowling, and growling.
"PHOEBE, NO!!!!!" I yelled, running to break it up. The cat escaped and fled down the stairs.
The dog guiltily flipped on her back in submissive pose, her brown eyes apologetic. I fell to my knees and, baring my teeth, growled at her and clamped my mouth around her throat.
She licked my face, wagging her tail.
"She doesn't seem very afraid of you," my husband observed.
I released her neck and sat back on my heels. "I thought I was very fierce actually." I said, disappointed. "Didn't you think I looked fierce?"
Rich considered. "You definitely had a wild look about you. The growling thing was a nice touch."
"Thanks."
Phoebe put her paws on my shoulder and began cleaning my face. "Cut it out!" I wrinkled my nose and pushed her away. She trotted over to her pillow and curled up, watching us both. "You're still a bad dog." I told her.
I looked at Rich and sighed. "What now?"
"I don't know, hon. Let's just keep trying to work with her a little longer and see what happens."
Phoebe just closed her eyes and snuggled in for an afternoon nap. Alpha Dog One and Alpha Dog Two were really quite nice, she decided sleepily. But they really don't know the first thing about cats.
12 comments:
You got pictures of the dog, but where are the pictures of you? I mean, how else will I know how to do it right? Not that I have any dogs, mind you, but someday I might. *blink*
(Came over from Tot's blog.)
I really do think there is a few pictures missing here. I need to take a peek at that wild look. You do keep the good stories coming.
I think the cats better take a stand. Lock them up in a small room and let 'em fight it out. Best cat wins.
Hmmmmmm. I asked around and my family refuses to take a picture of me in Alpha mode with the dog.
P.S. I can't hold the pose for very long anyway without getting licked to death!
P.P.S I thought about locking everyone together in a room too, Hoss. Rich is scared the dog might lose an eye or something. I guess I could stay in there with 'em and use a towel to swat anyone who gets too out of line.
um...
er...
ahem. My dog was raised by two of our three cats. Everytime he got within biting business, they would let him know who's boss. A couple times, I thought for sure he would lose an eye or half of his nose in the process. They really taught him well, however. To this day, they're the best of buddies.
Now it's dawned on me as I type this.. are your cats declawed? If so, then ignore my previous paragraph! You're gonna have the be the alpha human instead. back to growling like a dog! LOL
Or one thing you might try is the old coins in an empty coke can trick. If you haven't heard of this one, it works sometimes because the noise startles the dog into stopping, and that noise comes from the can instead of from you. Don't "Rattle" the can loudly before you throw it. Otherwise, he'll get used to it. He needs to associate NO! with the can itself, and that become the necessary evil instead of you!
What you do is put a few coins inside of a soda can, tape it shut. When the dog goes after the cats, throw the can in his direction, followed by a loud "NO!"
He'll come to associate the sound of the can with the word "no".
And your cats will realize when they hear that sound that help is on it's way. lol
good luck!
that is so funny. The pictures that aregoing around in my head right now are very wierd... very wierd lol
OMG, good luck with that. I have tried many a thing with all of the different pets I have owned, but never thought about establishing myself that way. Let me know if it works! Thanks for stopping by BTW. I'm glad to see that people haven't totally forgotten about me. Talk to you later!
That was hilarious Juno.
Hi folks! Good to see you again Lee.
Laura--I'm definitely giving the coke can idea whirl.
Here's a story that may or may not help, depends on how bad the dog's behavior really is and how much you need to modify it. A friend has broder collies and because she has broder collies she has sheep (can't have one with the other it seems) and the one of the collies was biting the sheep and after several different attempts to stop this behavior she bought a shock collar for the dog and put it on and let the dog get comfortable with it enough so that the collies forgot about the collar. Then one day when the dog was out with the sheep and bitting, she stayed out of sight of the dog and was watching with binoculars and just as the dog bit the sheep she shocked him and as far as the dog was concerned there are electric sheep out there and you can never know which ones are electric. Needless to say she never had to use the collar again as the dog never bit another sheep.
Haha, Annette, that's hilarious. "Electric sheep," that's so Hitchhiker's Guide!
I'm on the side of having the cats teach the dog a lesson! My old cat Banshee was the ONLY person in my house who was dominant to my psycho husky bitch Willow. Everyone grovelled to him: dogs, cats, humans. He disciplined my HUSBAND for back-talk and when I got a female cat he forbade her sleeping in my room! So yeah, let the cats lay a beating on that dog. I bet on the cats.
Thanks for the suggestions, Annette, that is too funny.
I have a friend in Oregon who got one of those collars to train his dog in a similar situation. I happened to call him on the phone one day as he was testing the unit out on his mom! I kept hearing strangled curses in the backgound.
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